Are We Too Busy Chasing the Rat Race to Have Friends?

Singapore prides itself on efficiency, productivity, and success. From a young age, people are taught to optimise our time, maximise our credentials, and stay competitive. But the latest Institute of Policy Studies (IPS) study raises a quieter, more uncomfortable question: in the pursuit of achievement, are we losing something fundamentally human?

The study found that more than 1 in 10 Singaporeans has no close friends. While 89.5% still report having at least one close friendship, the existence of a significant minority without such ties should concern us. Friendship, after all, is not a luxury. It is a core source of emotional support, belonging, and meaning.

What is striking is not just the absence of friendships, but where friendships come from. Most close friends are still formed through school and work. Once these institutional pathways disappear, opportunities for friendship shrink sharply. This might suggest that friendships in Singapore are often incidental, not intentional. We make friends because we are placed together, not because our society makes time and space for connection.

In a society shaped by the rat race, friendships can begin to feel expendable. Time spent with friends competes with long working hours, side hustles, caregiving responsibilities and self-improvement. Socialising becomes something to schedule around work, or gradually deprioritised altogether.

The IPS study also shows that those without close friends tend to be older and of lower socio-economic status. This points to inequality not just in income or opportunity, but in access to meaningful relationships. When survival takes priority, connection becomes costly.

Perhaps the real question is not why some Singaporeans lack close friends, but whether our definition of a “successful life” has quietly made friendship expendable.